Loose Fitting

In the news is the story that Duke Amstrad The Incompatible, alias Alan Sugar, went all thumbs with his Tweet button and made a racist comment.

Mentioning Marbella, dropping a hint that he is very rich because you have to be to have a property there, he asserted that a World Cup side reminded him of beach vendors from a particular Continent.

We have met many beach vendors in our time, now long ago, and they were a varied lot, having pitched up where we did. Only we were there for a "holiday" of sun, sand, sea and a dose of the runs if you were not careful. Some of the memories are still with us.

There was the English elderly lady who had splurged her savings to be there and needed to augment her pension. So in the morning when in the kitchen doing breakfast she would make cakes and later would be going along the beach with cries of "tout a beurre", "petite gateaux Anglais".

We occasionally bought some with the cry "Eh up, just like Barnsley", which caused people close to us to move giving us more space to spread out in. Then there was the Australian selling ice cream with a strident "Come and get your salmonella".

We passed on that on but asking politely if highway robbery was the crime his ancestor had committed to get to Aus'. Probably, I would get done for that one as an "ism" these days.

There were also Africans selling fabrics which in fact were very good as well as being striking in design and quite cheap. On one occasion the lady took a couple and in the evening ran up a loose frock for her when we were out later round the local bars.

That year the fashion designers from Paris were in town in the summer because Brigitte was having big parties and it was later that the annual fashion shows had African designs as a major feature of some of the collections.

Near fifty years on and in a different century and another world I suppose we would face allegations of cultural appropriation.